What is Love? Oxytocin and Other Love Hormones!

Remember when you love someone and everything looks beautiful. Not only in them but in everything else as well? Everything is sexy, cool, attractive. You are in heaven? There’s no-one better than your beloved in the world, never was, never will be?

Did you realize that it went on for a year, and then the same things starting to fade away? The heaven was not there anymore? Does the woman say you don’t love me the same as before? Does the man start finding other women more attractive than their own mate? 

In the beginning, the blind love the passionate love, the fire is created by the of releases serotonin, dopamine, and nor-adrenaline. Serotonin creates the feeling of well-being, happiness, and anchoring in the world. Dopamine creates intense focus, motivation, and better recall. Nor-adrenaline increases muscle tone, increased performance, blood pressure, increased heart rate, etc. Collectively, these hormones heighten your emotional state and suppress the analytical mind. This magical moment continues for a few months to years. The eventual outcome of this intense bond is sexual intercourse resulting in the formation of a new being.

The affectionate love is then produced by oxytocin which is released to keep them bonded beyond the initial months into a year or so. This way they will take care of the baby. Oxytocin-generated love empowers the woman to care for the baby and the man works to raise the family.

For a year, your brain released love, energy, focus, hormones for you. Oxytocin for example is one such powerful hormone.

Some men become addicted to the initial hormone cocktails. That is because they want to experience these hormones again.

Dopamine
So, how do you release dopamine?
Remember dopamine helps with focus, motivation, memory, emotions, pleasure, reward, sensation, and perception.
Telling suspenseful stories with cliff-hangers release a lot of dopamine.
Let me tell you such a story: my story when I encountered a motorbike that jumped the red-light. Did my bones break?

Oxytocin
Both men and women release oxytocin. Usually when they touch each other. Females release more oxytocin than men. Females bond strongly but will take time. This is also why remote relationships are difficult to maintain as the oxytocin release is reduced. 
Oxytocin makes you become more generous, it makes you trust more, and you bond to the person that raises your oxytocin.

Remember in women oxytocin is also produced when a baby suckles the nipples. The nerves from the nipples trigger the oxytocin release from the brain. Which in turn breast muscles contract and eject milk.

Let me tell you a story of my first patient passing away during the residency. Did you see how it created empathy?

How else can you help release oxytocin?
Make eye contact.
Hug
Touch/hold hands
Kiss

Endorphins
We release endorphins when we exercise, play, and laugh. It makes us creative, relaxed and focused.

Want to bring the love down a notch?
Touch less (less oxytocin.) Tell fewer stories (less dopamine.) Watch fewer movies together (less suspense, laughter, etc.)

Or release more stress hormones. The stress hormones are released by fear, anxiety, and uncertainty, these are cortisol and adrenaline.
When you have cortisol and adrenaline, you are in the fight, flight, or freight state, You become intolerant, irritable, uncreative, and critical. Your memory is impaired and you make bad decisions.

How do you reduce the stress hormones? Yoga or other light exercises, watch something pleasant, engaging, entertaining, or comical, phytoncides (go to woods/jungle/park, have plants at home that have fragrance,) hold a pencil in your teeth horizontally not vertically, massage your temples, deep breathing, change your position, eat or drink something, etc.

How to increase serotonin?
https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-increase-serotonin

Dopamine release
http://sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2018/dopamine-smartphones-battle-time/

PMS premenstrual syndrome
https://www.everydayhealth.com/pms/mood-swings.aspx